Bring It On! - Chapter 52

Chapter 52.

The delusion that we could overcome a crisis with brilliant survival strategies, like in a movie. That was the cause of failure. Jay and I crouched under a jutting hill, trying to take shelter from the rain. 

Drip, drip, drip. A thin stream of water trickled down from somewhere and soaked my bangs. We looked utterly pitiful.

The image of Suho at the cave entrance flashed in my mind. Him witnessing every second of my failure. That hollow, despairing gaze. I could almost hear his voice ringing in my ears, “Noona, are you crazy?”

Instead, Suho had actually waved his arms wide and shouted, “I’ll stay here! Come back when the rain stops!”

It was the safest and wisest choice given the situation. Trying to cross that torrent with Jay, who couldn’t even swim, was nothing short of suicide. In the end, after wandering about, we found this small gap under the hill.

“Ha… haha…”

Suddenly, laughter burst out of me. When I lowered my head, water pooled at my crown spilled down to the ground in a rush.

“What’s so funny?”

Jay tilted his head against the dirt wall, watching me chuckle with my shoulders shaking.

“Turns out the useless one isn’t you. It’s me.”

“All this over one mistake? You’ve still got a long way to go before you can claim the title of ‘useless.’”

“There must’ve been another way. Why was I so rash?”

It was as if I had been possessed, obsessed with the thought that I had to bring Jay over. Ever since the landslide, I’d been paralyzed by a compulsive sense of duty, as if I had to do something. 

Sometimes, the smarter choice is to calmly wait things out. What was I so anxious and desperate about? As I buried my head in my hands, consumed by self-loathing, a firm arm wrapped around my shoulder.

“This feels kind of cozy. Haven’t had this in a while.”

“In a while? …When have we ever had a cozy moment here?”

Jay’s eyes widened in mock shock as he scanned me up and down. His reproachful look caught me off guard. Why was he staring like that?

“I knew you were cold-blooded, but still—”

“Hey, come on. If struggling to survive on a deserted island counts as cozy, then sure, I’ll admit it.”

“Fine then. So what’s your definition of cozy?”

“What?”

The question came out of nowhere, and no answer popped into my head. I’d never even thought about it before, so of course I had no preferences or opinions ready. Jay’s gaze stayed fixed on me, unwavering, waiting patiently for my reply.

“Just… eating together in a nice place with a good view.”

“Eating together, huh?”

Running out of words, I glanced quickly around.

“Going for a walk… holding hands…”

“Mhm. And?”

“Looking at the stars, talking sweetly.”

“That’s pretty ordinary. We’ve done all that.”

He tilted his head lazily and smiled.

“…”

Had we done all that? We’d been through so much that I couldn’t remember the little things anymore. Maybe we had. Or maybe he was just teasing me. I pressed my lips shut and searched my memories.

Sharing a meal while admiring a view? That was plausible. After all, the one redeeming feature of this island was the wide-open azure sea, the lush trees, and the spotless sky. Talking beneath a sky full of stars was nothing unusual either. It happens all the time here.

Come to think of it, everything I’d listed were things we could easily do here. Maybe it was because I hadn’t seen or experienced much else. But among the things I’d said, there was definitely one we hadn’t done.

“When did we ever hold hands and go for a walk?”

“Already forgot?”

“Please. You can’t fool me that easily.”

“That hurts. Remember when we were chased by that snake? You clung to my hand the whole time, sweating bullets.”

Was this guy serious? How could he possibly call that life-or-death sprint a cozy walk? I let out a short, incredulous laugh.

As we traded silly banter, the heavy weight of self-reproach pressing down on me seemed to lighten. Maybe Jay had started this nonsense on purpose to cheer me up. Then again, he’d always had a knack for spouting weird things anyway.

A chill breeze swept through my hair. When I lifted my head, a world stained in dark crimson dyes came into view between the heavy storm clouds. The horizon stretched where the crooked ridges met the endless sea.

Around the sinking sun, a fiery glow pushed against the deep blue waves. Its descent left trails that seemed to bleed down along the slashing lines of rain. I realized that I’d never properly watched a sunset since coming here.

And here I was, calmly appreciating one in the middle of all this. The old me would never have imagined such leisure. Was it because Jay was here? The mere fact that he was by my side made me feel so secure.

The chatter that had filled every moment fell silent. Like me, Jay sat quietly, staring into the distance. 

But he wasn’t looking at the sky. Our eyes met, and he didn’t look away. Under the shadow, Jay seemed different somehow.

The thick lashes shading his eyes, the damp hair, the angled nose. All were in the colors of dusk. 

A familiar face suddenly felt unfamiliar. His full lower lip, the sharp jawline, the shadowed hollows of his eyes…

The darkness in his gaze wasn’t frightening, nor did it seem harsh. Instead, that steady, unyielding look stirred something in my chest. As if enchanted by the illusion spun by the sunset, we studied each other’s faces in silence for a long time.

“It’s starting to get chilly.”

Unable to bear the embarrassment, I was the first to speak. I wanted to break the strangely subdued atmosphere. 

But Jay still hadn’t moved. In his eyes, my face was firmly held captive.

I felt his hand sliding up along my back.

“Sun Woori.”

Our bodies, already close together, pressed in until no space remained between us.

“If I said I like you right now… would you be surprised?”

He asked, and then slowly laid his lips over mine. It wasn’t a deep kiss. It was careful, as though seeking permission. I didn’t pull away and instead wrapped my arms around his neck.

“I already know.”

***

Just a few days ago, I was convinced nights were shorter than days regardless of season. After working all day, eating dinner, washing up, before I knew it, it was morning again. That cruel and irrational routine seemed to happen every single day.

But now, I don’t know why the night feels so endlessly long and harsh. The moment the sun went down, my body temperature plummeted. 

Even just sitting curled up, I was shivering so hard my teeth chattered. Sniff. I couldn’t even tell if the wetness under my nose was snot or frost. I was wiping it with my stiff, frozen sleeve when it happened.

“Want to come in?”

Jay spread his arms and pointed to the space between his legs. Normally, I would’ve refused with a curt no thanks, but right now even the tiniest bit of warmth was desperate relief.

“Maybe I should.”

I didn’t hesitate and crawled into his arms. He was definitely warmer than me, and the heat seeping into me made it a little more bearable. But then I wondered. If I felt this warm, how was Jay feeling while holding me?

“You’re not cold?”

“Not at all. If anything, the heat’s getting hard to handle.”

That’s when I felt something thick and hot press against my back.

“What is this, a natural heater?”

“It can stay heated all night.”

“That’s… convenient, but try calming it down a bit.”

We had to endure here until sunrise, and I wasn’t about to spend the whole night pressed against a certain upright problem. It was enough to send even me, perfectly fine until now, into the wrong kind of thoughts.

“Will you help me?”

“…With what.”

“Now I can’t even take care of it myself without you.”

His lips pressed against the crook of my neck and shoulder. The heat of his mouth against my frozen skin made me shudder violently. Jay chuckled against me, lips still there, and kept sucking on the same spot.

“Still cold?”

“Ugh, get… off…”

“I know a way to make you warmer.”