You Said You Wanted Us to Break Up - Chapter 79

Taking me, with my tear-stained face, out of Sioden’s study, Apple explained in a soft, steady voice.

“Even if he found out we were trying to raise funds, the attempt to secure a ship to Emerta won’t have been discovered yet. When I put down the deposit for the ship, I didn’t do it myself; I borrowed the identity of someone the merchant knew.”

Apple seemed to believe that although the selling of the jewels was caught, the actual arrangement for the ship hadn’t been exposed.

“I contacted the merchant, and he said he doesn’t seem to have been followed yet.”

But the anxiety didn’t easily disappear. With a voice still shaky from crying, I asked her,

“What if that person was also tracked?”

“We only put down a deposit to avoid that kind of situation. The amount isn’t large, so it doesn’t attract attention.”

Apple carefully wiped my face with a damp cloth.

“So, we just need to leave before we’re caught.”

It was a reassuring statement.

It felt as if a spark of hope was being rekindled in my heart, which I thought was already steeped in despair. Emerta, which I had deliberately suppressed by yelling at Sioden, shimmered before me again. The bright Southern weather, completely different from Raslet’s, and the beautiful resorts and exotic customs Apple had told me about began to occupy a corner of my mind again.

It was then that a sudden thought struck me.

I urgently spoke to Apple, who was looking at me kindly.

“I, I got angry at Sioden.”

It was the first time I had ever raised my voice like that during our marriage.

“I yelled, and I was sarcastic… So, from now on, I might not be able to go out…”

Before the words that might not be able to go out could pass my lips, Apple hugged me. As her warm embrace enveloped me, the anxiety melted away like a lie.

Apple whispered into my ear as I slowly relaxed in her arms.

“You did well.”

She stroked my back and repeated the same words. You truly did well.

After reassuring me like that, Apple quietly added,

“Don’t worry about the aftermath. I’ll take care of it.”

* * *

However, if the trip to Emerta hadn’t been foiled, I couldn’t just leave my relationship with Sioden in this state.

On the other hand, if I went back and apologized, it would look ridiculous. In the worst case, my reluctance would be too obvious, which could actually raise suspicion.

As I worried about the most natural way to maintain what I had previously been guaranteed, a message came from Sioden. It was a letter asking if I would see him because he wanted to apologize.

If I accepted his apology and admitted that I, too, had been rude, the problem could be patched up, at least superficially.

With that thought, I went out to meet him.

“I’m sorry about the other day. I wasn’t trying to force your forgiveness, but…”

“It’s alright. My words were harsh that day too.”

Sioden stared at me, who was meekly apologizing with a demeanor completely different from a few days ago.

Just when I thought he might be doubting my state of mind, he spoke.

“There is something I wish to give you.”

Sioden then led me to the reception room.

He seemed to have decided it was better to avoid the study, where bad things had happened.

A jeweler selling ornaments was waiting in the reception room, where the lord received guests.

Did he think the problem arose because of the ornaments and try to solve it with ornaments? That question naturally arose, but I sat on the sofa as he directed. I expected him to sit next to me, but Sioden took a seat on another sofa diagonally across from me.

Soon, the jeweler and his assistant displayed the ornaments before me.

“Please choose whatever catches your eye.”

“…You choose something you think is beautiful.”

I had never sold the jewels because I truly wanted new ones, and I could neither sell nor wear the jewels gifted by him. The former was due to the circumstances, and the latter was due to my own unwillingness.

The quality would have already been checked by the jeweler, so picking just anything would resolve the situation, but Sioden shook his head.

“I don’t have an eye for these things, so I won’t be able to choose something that satisfies you.”

If he said that, postponing the choice further was meaningless.

Choosing ornaments was something I had done often before, so it was not difficult.

After choosing about three pieces that were of decent quality, had a beautiful color by objective standards of beauty, and weren’t too uniquely crafted, Sioden motioned to the aide who was waiting nearby.

While I looked down silently as the man paid for the items, I heard Sioden ask the jeweler,

“Can something like this be used as currency?”

He was pointing to a bracelet finely set with small green jewels, each no bigger than a child’s pinky fingernail.

The bracelet was a double strand, and there seemed to be roughly a hundred of the small jewels hanging from it.

The jeweler bowed respectfully and answered,

“Each stone would fetch about one gold coin.”

And the man immediately added,

“However, this type of jewelry is valuable due to the craftsmanship, so it is best not to break it apart.”

Sioden did not seem to be paying close attention to the jeweler’s words. He motioned to his aide one more time. The Lord’s aide, whose face and name I vaguely knew, quickly wrote out a promissory note that included the price of the bracelet and then brought the box containing the ornaments to Sioden.

Sioden looked down at the box with a face that was as calm as it was inscrutable. After a moment of silence, he picked up the box and approached me. Just as the seat next to me sank slightly, the man’s hand gently took my wrist.

“Fortunately, it fits well.”

As I looked at the bracelet that was suddenly clasped onto my wrist, a soft voice fell from above my head.

“I thought it would be good for you to carry when you go out.”

Did that mean I was allowed to go out again? I had been cooped up in my room lately because I was conscious of him.

As if reading my mind, Sioden said,

“You don’t need to refrain from going out because of me. I won’t stop you, so feel free to come and go.”

So, it seemed going out was not completely forbidden.

Though it would likely be best to exercise caution, as I would surely be watched, my chest, which had felt constricted since entering his reception room, felt somewhat relieved.

Unintentionally, I murmured in a slightly gentler voice,

“…A thin bracelet like this is easily broken.”

The bracelet looked like the small jewels would sway prettily with every step, but the crafted gold chain was thin.

A woman’s grip could likely snap something like this.

“I might lose the jewels.”

“It’s fine. Wear it.”

Answering immediately as if such a thing was no issue, Sioden added before I could reply.

“Even if a few jewels fall out, people like me won’t notice.”

Did he mean for me to wear it without worry?

As I observed the bracelet and tried to gauge his meaning, Sioden further commented,

“I only recovered the ornaments because I wanted to return them to you.”

“……”

“Now that I know you dislike them, the same thing won’t happen again.”

After I had selected all the ornaments, Sioden dismissed me right away, as if that was the only reason for the meeting.

I pondered his attitude for the rest of the day. And I came to a conclusion.

I told Apple, who was helping me prepare for bed, that conclusion.

“I think you’re right.”

Apple, who was approaching me with a comb and scented oil, tilted her head slightly as if she didn’t understand. I explained further to her.

“Sioden still doesn’t know that I’m planning to go to Emerta.”

But he might realize it at any moment.

In such an uncertain situation, there was only one way forward. Feeling Apple’s hands brush my hair, I confessed my resolution.

“I have to deceive him before it’s too late.”

I needed to appear as though I had no other hidden agenda.

Only then would he stop looking into me.

* * *

But I didn’t know how to lie well.

For several days after I realized what I needed to do, I agonized over it, but no suitable method came to mind to stop Sioden’s suspicion.

Finally, unable to bear the frustration, I went out into the castle hallway late at night. I thought maybe a walk would help me think of something.

How did I lie when I was little? I was even having such ridiculous thoughts in case they might help when a memory suddenly surfaced.

‘Don’t even think about hiding something; don’t do anything in the first place.’

Iswen had said such things to me repeatedly when I was young.

Since I hadn’t thought about lying for a long time afterward, I could only approach it theoretically. Lying to someone is another way of making them believe an untrue fact.

When I decided to deceive Sioden, I had two options. To make him believe that I wouldn’t leave, or to make him believe that I would stay with him in Raslet in the future.

I had to make him believe that I would stay in Raslet, rather than just that I wouldn’t leave. The two conditions seemed similar at first glance but were very different.

To deny any premise, one must first be suspicious.

That meant to conclude that I wouldn’t leave, he first had to entertain the thought that I might.

A suspicion once implanted doesn’t easily vanish.

Therefore, it was safer to plant a new belief than to force him to verify a suspicion. But how could I possibly make Sioden believe that we would be together in the future?

‘From now on, don’t tell me you’re sorry, and don’t tell me you can explain.’

‘……’

‘Because no matter how much I listen, I don’t want to understand.’

…I had already said something like that.

My pace down the hallway quickened slightly. Apple, who was walking beside me holding a lamp, said,

“You should go to sleep now.”

“I’ll walk just a little longer.”

It was then that I heard music coming from somewhere in the hallway.

Though the notes were faint, I immediately recognized the instrument. It was the organ.

And only one person in Raslet Castle could play the organ.

Sioden.