There Is No Paradise Where You Escaped - Chapter 92

“Let’s go to Preston in the spring,” Edwin whispered sweetly, holding her tightly in his arms.

Vivianne giggled as his breath tickled her ear, and she burrowed deeper into his embrace, looking up at him.

His face was blurry.

It felt like it was hidden behind fog, or perhaps her vision had simply grown too poor to see him clearly.

“We’ll meet your parents.”

‘That sounds wonderful. I want to meet them right away. They’ll really like you.’

“And we’ll spend the whole day rolling through blooming lavender fields, eating all the things you love.”

‘There are so many lavender fields around the house I used to live in, in Preston. I want to show them to you.’

An excited Vivianne smiled brightly and nestled deeper into his arms. She could hear the loud thumping of his heart. His breath, tickling her hair, was real. The warmth, the deep scent—everything felt vivid and alive.

“So, Vivianne…”

‘Mm?’

She lifted her head again at his gentle, tender voice.

She squinted, trying to make out his face, but no matter how she strained, his features wouldn’t come into focus.

That only made her more anxious and frustrated.

Even when she reached out to touch his cheek, she couldn’t feel any warmth in her fingertips.

“Wake up.”

‘I am awake. We were just talking.’

As his lips touched her forehead, the tip of her nose, and finally her lips, her uneasy heart began to calm.

‘Honestly, you… You haven’t been very attentive lately—only at times like this. You must have done something wrong to me, haven’t you?’

Vivianne pouted, grumbling, and he kissed her deeply.

Their slow breaths gradually quickened, and the kiss grew increasingly passionate.

But the kiss, which should have been intense and hot, felt like nothing at all.

Something felt strange.

Vivianne slowly opened her eyes, but there was no passionate kiss, just the hazy figure looking at her quietly.

“Wake up now. You’ve slept enough, haven’t you?”

He straightened the blankets for her and got off the bed.

After kissing her forehead and stroking her cheek, he gazed down at her for a while before turning away.

‘Where are you going?’

She asked anxiously, watching him retreat.

But no answer came.

Vivianne tried to sit up, but her body felt impossibly heavy.

‘Honey! Where are you going? Say something, please. Why are you leaving me? I don’t want to be alone. Stay with me. Honey, please!’

Frightened, Vivianne desperately called after him.

But he didn’t hear her— he just vanished.

────── ✾ ──────

 ‘Honey…’

As Vivianne slowly lifted her heavy eyelids, the first thing she saw was a pale, hazy ceiling.

The lingering aftertaste of the dream made it hard to distinguish reality. She had shared affection with her beloved husband. It had been so blissfully happy that seeing his back as he left her behind was unbearably sad. Vivianne absentmindedly reached for the space beside her. 

The bed was empty.

She exhaled a slow, dry breath, and her mind began to clear little by little.

      Wait… I fell off the forest path.

So did I die? Or am I still alive?

Fragments of scattered memories began piecing themselves back together. Mixed in were memories she couldn’t tell whether were dreams or reality.

As her mind fully cleared, Vivianne felt the weight of her body dragging her down, as if she were being sucked into the center of the earth.

Even a single finger was hard to move.

She didn’t even have the strength to sit up, let alone ring the bell.

Just then, the bedroom door opened.

It wasn’t Sophie.

Another maid entered and first checked the fireplace.

Realizing her body was in such a wrecked state that even speaking was difficult, Vivianne summoned every ounce of strength she had left.

“Ex…cuse me…”

At the faint sound, the maid froze.

She turned around quickly—and their eyes met.

Seeing Vivianne awake, the maid startled violently.

“Oh my goodness, Miss Vivianne!”

The maid ran over at full speed and yanked the bell cord several times with all her strength.

She asked the same questions over and over: if Vivianne was in pain, if her body felt all right.

She began explaining that Vivianne had suffered a severe head injury and had been asleep for a long time, but none of it registered in Vivianne’s mind.

The first to rush into the room at the sound of the bell from Vivianne’s quarters was none other than Susanna.

“Oh my god… Miss Aveline.”

Seeing the relief spread across Susanna’s face, Vivianne stiffly forced the corners of her mouth into a smile.

“Are you okay? Does anything hurt? I was actually just coming to give you your medicine when I heard the bell. I was so surprised. Thank goodness. I’m so relieved you’ve woken up.”

With tears welling in her eyes, Susanna held Vivianne’s thin hand tightly.

Then, noticing how cracked Vivianne’s lips were, Susanna instructed the maid to bring some water and a cloth.

“You must be very thirsty, right?”

Vivianne couldn’t speak, but she nodded as best as she could.

The maid returned with water and a damp cloth.

Susanna soaked the cloth and gently moistened Vivianne’s lips.

As drops of water trickled into her mouth and down her throat, the stinging pain gradually subsided.

“You’ve been asleep for more than a week. I know it must be painful right now, but hang in there. You’ll recover soon.”

Vivianne had thought only a day had passed, so hearing she’d been asleep for over a week felt unreal.

“Eddie will be here soon. He must’ve heard the news by now.”

At the mention of his name, the husband from her dream came to mind. His face had been blurry, but perhaps he resembled Edwin. Or maybe that was just a trick of her mind, because their voices had sounded similar.

But since she had thought of the man in her dream as her husband, it was highly unlikely he was actually Edwin.

Vivianne wondered where Edwin was.

What had he been thinking as he watched her sleep for over a week?

Did he feel sorry he hadn’t been the one to end her life?

Or had he wished she would just hurry up and die?

The husband from her dream, who looked like Edwin, had been so warm and kind. A man who would never strangle her, never point a gun at her. A man who held her close and showed her nothing but love.

He was completely different from Edwin, the one who wished for her death.

────── ✾ ──────

Charlotte’s trial was scheduled for the very next day.

In the end, Gideon hadn’t been able to find a lawyer and rushed straight to Rottermond. He needed to see Edwin.

Sitting across from Edwin, Gideon showed no interest in the coffee before him. 

“Has Miss Aveline still not woken up?” He asked anxiously.

Without answering, Edwin took a sip of his coffee.

That alone was his reply.

“I understand your anger, Your Grace. You nearly lost someone precious to you, so it’s only natural that you’re furious with Miss Windler.”

Nervousness made Gideon’s palms sweat uncontrollably. He wiped them on his thighs, but it did nothing.

Cornered, with no other option, Gideon chose to be honest.

“You haven’t heard what really happened that day from Miss Windler yet, have you? I’ll tell you everything.”

This time, Edwin responded—he set down his teacup and assumed a posture of careful attention.

“Miss Windler believed you and Miss Aveline were lovers. You two were exceptionally close, and… she even witnessed your intimate moments firsthand. She thought such closeness was natural because you were in love. But that day, Miss Aveline confessed she did not love you.”

Gideon watched the Duke’s impassive face, unsure if this strategy would work. While it felt like sowing discord, it was the truth.

Charlotte had loved the Duke of Baytness. Perhaps she still did. But Charlotte—who had intended to step back, now that they were a couple—became enraged upon hearing Vivianne declare it wasn’t love.

“Miss Windler felt that someone dear to her was being insulted by Miss Aveline. When Miss Aveline tried to approach her, she told her not to come closer and pushed her away… What happened afterward, the Duke already knows.”

Gideon had hoped to convince him that it wasn’t something worth being so furious about.

Vivianne didn’t love the Duke—so how could he be this cruel to a family member he’d spent so many years with?

“I see,” was all the Duke said. He added nothing more, only lifted the steaming cup to his lips again.

“Your Grace, I do think Miss Windler did wrong. No matter how frightened she was, there are lines you shouldn’t cross. But to deny her even a chance to make things right—that seems too harsh to me. Please, won’t you give her just one chance?”

Gideon pleaded earnestly.

The few seconds it took for Edwin to take a deep breath and exhale felt like minutes.

“I will follow the law,” Edwin replied.

But those fortress-like words crushed Gideon’s hopes.

“Charlotte will go to trial tomorrow, and she’ll be found guilty. That’s all I want. So I think it’s time you stopped, Baron. For someone who came here saying not to waste effort on a woman who doesn’t even love me, you’re certainly putting in a lot of effort.”

Having said his piece, Edwin stood up.

He turned to leave, telling a servant to see the guest out properly—

But just then, a knock came at the door.

A servant entered, beaming brightly.

“Your Grace. Miss Aveline has awakened.”

At that news, Edwin’s usually impassive face wavered visibly. He immediately began to walk.

The news that Vivianne had regained consciousness reached Gideon, too, and he clasped his hands in deep relief.

Amid a string of misfortunes, it was the one piece of good news they’d desperately needed.

 ────── ✾ ──────

Thanks to Susanna, Vivianne was able to wet her throat. She sat up and looked out at the brightened landscape of Rottermond. Outside the window, melting snow dripped, and each time a drop fell, sunlight streamed in, dazzling her eyes.

Knock, knock.

At the sound of knocking, Susanna smiled and said Edwin must be here.

And she was right.

Edwin entered the bedroom, his ice-blue eyes fixed on Vivianne as he stood motionless for a moment.

Susanna and the other servants quietly left the room.

As all the noise faded, the dream returned to her in a sudden flash.

‘Honey! Where are you going? Say something, please. Why are you leaving me? I don’t want to be alone. Stay with me. Honey, please!’

Vivianne came back to herself when she heard footsteps approaching.

The slanted sunlight illuminated Edwin’s face. As his features became clear, so too did the face of the husband from her dream.

Flustered, Vivianne quickly averted her gaze.

And with that, the dream faded again.

“… I still can’t speak well right now.”

Thanks to the water Susanna had given her, speaking a few short words wasn’t hard, but stringing together long sentences was still a challenge.

Edwin remained as composed and calm as ever. With his usual slow and unhurried manner, he sat by the bedside.

His intense gaze could be felt even without words.

When the silence began to feel awkward, Vivianne hesitantly turned her eyes toward him.

But his gaze revealed nothing.

Whether he was glad, regretful, or indifferent—she couldn’t tell.

In his hollow blue eyes, all she could see was the reflection of her own gaunt face.

“… Edwin?”

A faint sense of unease crept in.

Vivianne slowly reached out and grasped his wrist.

Then, as Edwin looked down at her hand, he slowly took hers in return.

The warmth and pressure of his grip spread from her fingertips through her whole body.

“I thought… you wouldn’t wake up.”

The anxiety inside her finally settled, and peace returned.

Vivianne smiled gently.

“Were you… waiting for me?”

At her own question, her heart began to race.

The man from her dream resurfaced in her mind.

If it had been him, she felt sure he would have said yes—that he had waited for her with desperate longing. He was the kind of person who would have.

She wondered what that dream man’s name was—the one who had looked like Edwin. The name of the husband she had loved so deeply that he could give her warmth or sadness.

“Yes. I was waiting.”

Could she ever have that dream again?

Would she have the chance to ask for his name?

But she decided not to wait for that chance.

“Desperately.”

Because somehow, she already felt like she knew his name.